what if life was self designed
what if life was like that moment in the pub in vanilla sky ... where he realises that anything he wants will happen all around him?
where would you be and how would you be,
if you could be, everything, anything you wanted to be, with no comebacks?

just for today? id be in the kothrud flat, with the rain crashing just like this, and all my music and my byron, and adit and chatts. and id rain. like its raining today

ive been listening to this song on repeat for the last few days whenever Im home

Nobody feels any pain
Tonight as i stand inside the rain
Everybody knows
That baby's got new clothes
But lately i see her ribbons an' her bows
Have fallen from her curls.
She takes just like a woman, yes she does
She makes love just like a woman, yes she does
An' she aches just like a woman
But she breaks like a little girl.

when night falls
and the clowns retire
theres noone in the chairs to see
white paint broken by 2 brown lines
rivers, hiccups of fear & pain
when everyone in the show has gone home again
the clowns rain