if i was untrue, hope u knew, it was never to you

week after week flashes by. nothing to say, really. nothing that hasnt been said already. the things that need telling, i dont know how to tell, or indeed, if i should, or ever could. how to find the words? the heart? the courage? dil mein taqat, jigaar mein haal kahaan?

anyway, shifting to another gear, i felt a little bad abt the press release by R where he said 'they obviously knew who was the best' and narry a mention of the other 4 companies the contract was jointly awarded to, but then maybe it doesnt matter.

The bull is apparently running like never before and even i am making some :)

No football this friday. No rowing this weekend. No invites. No friends. No phone calls. Just me and Java. Need to start studying. Honest - this is pathetic! Its steppenwolf's fault, cz he has me in his grip - major distraction.

In the blog world, another one bites the dust, another old blog friend closes down his blog. Reasons are familiar. Vie, ur a wise one. The thing is, the min something is written by someone u know, someone who is a friend, the reader reacts to it like its a friend telling u something abt their lives. ie, they look for the person in the prose. which is something which will invariably frustrate the writer if he is not concerned with his person-ality but rather with his prose ... ummm ... bah! i got lost somewhere there. Maybe its the same with real writers as well, bcz i remember having once read some cribbing to the effect in immortality (kundera)

I was browsing through the old blog and came across my first post ... the way we were! And life goes on; in endless circles; drunkenly overlapping and overrunning eachother. it takes a lot, i sometimes feel, to stay faithful ... to ur dream, to ur self, to life. to stay, true to life. Song in my head ...

By now, I have worked in 3 continents and in 4 offices and this is my fav amongst all my work environments. Just for the simple little traditions they have which make things a little bit cosier. Also, the dreaded C word is not such a dirty word here. or maybe i should say 'yet'. No horsing around apart, i like the people here. Theres something very sweet and warm and even genuine abt them

Outside, its fall again: my favourite time of the year. The tree's begin to blush again. The roads are littered with discarded leaves. maple leaves? another one for the series? :) i go to a bench behind the office to eat my lunch. as i munch through my lunch, i watch a leave swirl and dance lazily down to the grass. if i asked you, as u stand tall, swaying gracefully in the wind, why did you pick this leaf to discard, would you answer me, or stare at me with doe-caught-in-the-headlight eyes? later, as i walk back to the office, i saw a little bird lying on its back on the sidewalk. it was white and blue and grey and very beautiful. it was obviously still alive, but each time i tried to go near it, to see if i could help, it would scratch out with its claws. maybe it could sense that the end was near and was saving me the trouble? Song in my head ...

Come September, its that time of the year when i miss cal the most of all ... pujo? Nyet! founders day. the joys of going back to school and getting sloshed on sponsored booze along with ur gods of yesterday ... priceless. Some people never got over 'Nam or the night their band opened for Nirvana. 'Someone' never really got over Charlie. Most Martinians, I think, never get over School.


Originally posted @ http://prerona.blogspot.com/2005/09/if-i-was-untrue-hope-u-knew-it-was.html

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