sister of my soul. and other ramblings.

still tired and nauseus almost all the time
under a couple of layers of miscellaneous excitements
is a layer of calm numbness
and beneath that a speechless panic that
next a layer of impotent detachment.

as it watches the rotating mind pass that spot again
where it knows a way of life has passed for ever
and though the table has been cleared
and the sorbet brought in,
i have no clue what i want for my next course
at the bottom, i think, is stinging angst
of feeling unsettled and unsure
and just plain missing friends
and their reality checks.

without you to give me a reference point
without you to laugh with,
without you crack stupid inside jokes with,
without you to talk about love, life and men with,
friendless, twinless, alone.
anyone else is too many words away
noone knows as much background as you
i could talk but who'd understand
half sentences, like you do.

watching Hazaaron Khwaishen reawekens the itch
and relocates it tantalisingly, teasingly,
just barely out of reach.
what who where is this thing
i ache to be.

outside, its a sunny day.
and i'm feeling much better today,
thank you. a bit busy (for polite non conversation).
brb. catch you. cheers. happy new year to you too.


  1. yeah happy new year

    need to spread some good cheer

    enough cold turkey

  2. Even men are not ao different from women.

    Someone loves you, you love someone, and the person who finally steps in.

    As they say, "Bawra Mann Mera"

  3. Inkblot, Happy New Year to you too! why enough cold turkey? And where are you getting all this good cheer business from? Maybe we should queue up for some too!

    Happy New Year, Prometheus! True. Dissatisfaction is probably a human issue that trandescends gender :)

    Bawra it is! And how .... lol!