Sometimes I get so tired of following strings, taking care of the child, trying to keep these wilting relationships alive, weave a family from these old, tangled, ragged, dirty, delicate threads. Sometimes, I wish I could gather all the threads of my life, collect all the people that I am, iwishtherewasonemoreicouldthinkof for symmetry, and dump the whole mass, trailing loose ends, knotted, jumbled, torn bits, hopeless pieces, colourful patterns, lost threads and all and dump it all on someones lap to sort out for me and say I'm sorry, I'm lost without a trace. Where would find someone like that: clever enough, grownup enough, who cared enough, strong enough. Would I hate them the next moment bcz deep down I'll know them to be false gods, false feet to fall at?
Originally Posted at Prerona.