im a coward ... i feel sorry for creeps and cant tell them how much i hate them
i smile and "stay chill" and wear masks ... and avoid them as much as possible

but sometimes it hurts
sometimes i wonder
how can people be like this ...
how can someone betray you in everyway - how can someone bitch about you, betray your confidences
and spend their lives whining and crying and gathering sympathy
how can you be prostrate with grief bcz
you think ur in love with someone who you barely know
yet you do things like this to them ...
how can you make a fuss over every slight slight you think has been given to you
and be totally impervious to all the dirt you dish out
how can you be so wallowing in self pity and so magnify things that happen to you
what would you do if you were faced with real pain ...
what would you do if ur father raped you
what would you do if you lost your parents
what would you do if you were starving, jobless, and hopeless
what would you do if you had aids and you were dying

oh! what rubbish I dish out early in the morning
im the worst of all i know ... this is what i dislike most in me ... why am I so bloody judgemental all the time ...
sanctimonious ;) yeah!
anyway ... who gives a shit anyway ... lifes like that. shit happens. u gotto keep moving on. thats all.
and you gotto try to be brave. i can handle it - whatever it is.

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