i seek something more, something elusive, like silver sand. now I think I found it, and there, its gone again.
little help from my friends ...
Like how good or bad it is, How its different from an Master of Fine Arts, How good the college is, etc?
If anyone who reads this knows about (or knows anyone who knows about) this course, or fine arts courses in general, or SMFA Boston - Post-Baccalaureate programs in the USA ... I would really appreciate it if you got in touch ... :)
New Blog
pop-quiz
You Are Expressionism |
Moody, emotional, and even a bit angsty... you certainly know how to express your emotions. At times, you tend to lack perspective on your life, probably as a result of looking inward too much. This introspection does give you a flair for the dramatic. And it's even maybe made you cultivate some artistic talents! You have a true artist's temperament... which is a blessing and a curse. |
beautiful rainy sunday ...
magic light outside
perfect to stay home
with hot chocolate and stare blankly out or watch movies with
lots of cushion and throws :D
you know about freudian slip?
my poison is music
i keep doing it. thank god, most people
dont catch on
song in my head
but sometimes my "head" tweaks the words
so here's an oldie for you ...
ps - question in my head? how do you know you love someone. heard someone asking this last night ... curious, what are your thoughts?
questions
from the Bridges of Madision County, (isnt that ironic) "In a universe of ambiguity, this kind of certainty comes only once."
from Gone with the Wind, "a lady can do no more"
from the beatles, "your's sincerely, wasting away"
from a key chain that a friend got each one of us in school, each had our own names and the pic of a state in 'the states' and a message (i think from that state) and mine said west virgina, wild and wonderful
from when harry met sally, "when you figure out who you want to spend the rest of your life with ..."
from hi fidelity, "its not what you are like, but what you like"
from dr. zhivago, "life. he wants to see life ..."
from my uncle, (we were spening the night talking about life, in a forrest bunglow somewhere, in some god forsaken part of bihar, "first you must know what you want"
from my dad (first time caught smoking), at the end of the day you are a person, a "me"
notting hill/song, "make them all my souvenires"
jesus christ superstar, "he's just a man"
Its a beautiful day ...
Maybe the postman came (ref: queen. courtsey reader complaint)
But I just stayed away from home
So I dont know what he delivered
I dont wanna know
Arent ostrichs pretty animals?
I'm tired of the "out there" (ref: withheld)
But, what do I do. Why am I laughing? Life is such a joke
Went for a walk early this morning, and ended up here.
Came back and had a lot of work but sat there and listened to Pandora for a tiny while ... listening to wish you were here, again.
the nice thing about having B here is she makes me miss b just a little less. We almost dont talk in full sentennces anymore. and she too can cope with the jumping wildy random topics. multithreading. and the bizzarre obscure little things that worry excite sadden us ... which it would be so hard to share otherwise. we went for lunch at a little italian-ish place. awesome food. expensive, by my meagre standards. but the best part was the talkathon.
Happy Valentines Day
On a different note, check this out, I loved it! http://www.phdcomics.com/comics.php?f=823
you and i, by the scorpions, from the Pure Instincts album, on youtube
I lose control because of you babe
I lose control when you look at me like this
there's something in your eyes that is sayin' tonight
I'm not a child anymore, life has opened the door
to a new exciting life
I lose control when I'm close to you babe
I lose control don't look at me like this
there's something in your eyes, is this love at first sight
like a flower that grows, life just wants you to know
all the secrets of life
It's all written down in your lifelines
it's written down inside your heart
You and I just have a dream
to find our love a place
where we can hide away
you and I were just made
to love each other now
forever and a day
I lose control because of you babe
I lose control when you look at me like this
there's something in your eyes that is sayin' tonight
I'm so curious for more just like never before
in my innocent life
It's all written down in your lifelines
it's written down inside your heart
You and I just have a dream
to find our love a place
where we can hide away
you and I were just made
to love each other now
forever and a day
Time stands still
when days of innocence are falling for the night
I love you girl I always will
I swear I'm there for you till the day I'll die
Underwater Worlds
I was very worried when I started off on this. Burnt my bridges and leaped off into the dark. My first gamble. I wondered if it was worth it, constantly. My family and some friends still cant get why I would reject oxford to do a vague course i dont even know much about. Last few weeks have been so hard, struggling so hard just to keep abreast, that I too, wondered if I must not have been a bit mad. But this morning, browsing, checking bloglines, every article of interest to me was somehow related to something i had done in some class, or something i had a vagueish idea about what they were going on about ... I am sure I didnt express that just the way I meant it ... but, that really made me feel, in a funny way, that I had, infact, done the right thing. The right thing for me.
I am dying to go somewhere. I've never travelled alone just for fun though. Feels weird to do it now. Desperately want to get away, though. Anywhere. Even if its just for a day.
I am inspired by Barbie's taking one year off to travel. Would I ever do it? Suddenly, as for the first time I feel like I might have a vague idea of the direction I really want to go in, and life seems, if not on, then a little closer to the track, the hurry to "get god knows where", prove something, be someone seems to calm and for the first time, I think, like "one of them", I could also imagine atleast, taking a year off to do nothing.
Baba and Barbie are in Andaman. Snorkelling. Walking through the old prison walls. Him telling stories of yesterday the way only he could, and today, and everything. Him being himself. She will probably at some point say "didi said ..." and give away some half baked funda i used sometime to impress her, watch her gape, lol, and he will probably tell her its all crap. Damn. I wanted them to do this now. I knew I would never go to Andaman. Or Somnath. Did'nt know they would throw in Kerala though. I have always longed and longed and longed to go to Kerala. Someday. Strangers become friends as we drift. That is the part of journeying with family that I miss most. I, open to those I love, become ultra social in the company of any one person I care about. Alone, I usually become the solitary brooding scorpion.
Is it a wonder, Meet Joe Black, on my mind? But then, let his eyes light up. Thats enough.
works done. deadlines over. now i'm bored ...
and reading old posts from this blog before i moved out and moved back in. all the way back, from when i was in texas! Here's one: where does this road lead
And I loved this on rimi's blog!
| Which Positive Quality Are You? Your Result: Charity You are Charity. The spirit of giving has been promoted by every religion. Charity is kindness. It is compassion for our fellow man. Charity doesn't ask anything in return, and in this way it serves as the opposite of greed. "Be charitable with many." | |
| Love | |
| Friendship | |
| Courage | |
| Peace | |
| Faith | |
| Which Positive Quality Are You? | |
| What color are you? Your Result: Pink You are pink! You are girly and though you may not like to show it, it shines through all the same. If you are a guy then...well, you're gay. You are a happy person who likes to make others happy. Smiling is your favorite thing to do. | |
| White | |
| Yellow | |
| Purple | |
| Green | |
| Blue | |
| Red | |
| Black | |
| What color are you? Take More Quizzes | |
| what Kinda Guy Is YOUR type? Your Result: Cocky Guy a guy that could care less what you think or care less about your feelings. One that would rather hang with the guys and treat you like your second best. hes there but only when he wants to mess around or get laid. So if this is your type.....good luck.... | |
| Punk/Goth | |
| Pretty Boys | |
| Kick/Country Boy | |
| what Kinda Guy Is YOUR type? Quiz Created on GoToQuiz | |
I feel like going somewhere - very much
just random'ly
the way we would when we were kids
or rather parents would and we'd tag along
people would have come for dinner
and they'd be sitting and chatting over dessert
and suddenly get up and decide to drive off somewhere for the weekend
most of the times, i enjoy the sanity and peace of the being
the boring and straitlaced person i am
but once in a while i miss the madness of my childhood
growing up with my mad gypsy parents
Koffee with Karan: Neetu Singh and Rishi Kapur
Pyar Ka Side Effects
This is why I like Rahul Bose. Even when he does a crappy movie, with some random person, the result is hilarious and wonderful! I loved this movie. I had been trying to convert a wannabe phirang pal over to bollywood latley, one of my favourite soapboxes. I gave up when he did'nt love this movie! If you have any kind of sense of humour, if you are one of those always complaining about my lack thereof, watch this movie :D
Its probably a cliched, hackneyed theme. Nothing new in the story, but it didnt need the novelty. Something about the way it was carried off was fresh and real and full of "oh my god I've been there moments". My favourite was bose's pal who hates to change his underwear. Or the one where the same friend tells a heartbroken bose, freshly ditched by sherawat, that ofcourse she'll take him back, because she has already spent three years 'training him'. Or on a more serious (?) note, when he tries to forget her by dating again, but cant get it together with anyone else, and one of his new girlfriends tells him, you ran away for fear of committment, but inside your head, you already are committed to her.
Not to mention the awesome soundtrack. The fact that he was a DJ reminded me of hi-fidelity. And the fact that he is narrating it, as well. There are shades of them in each other, but ofcourse, even rahul bose cannot ever come close to cussack for
me (you are what you like, not what you are like). Even otherwise, 'so exasperating but cannot help loving him' scale, this character is nowhere near the one in hi-fi. But the movie is fun.
Damn. Now I'll probably have "most of the time" on my head all day tomorrow!
Looking for a new start, again ...
will this work any better?
does a new face bring a new voice?
amsterdam on my mind
checked purple flowers
Originally uploaded by preron.
purple tulips
Originally uploaded by preron.
its been a long time since the amsterdam trip, but for some reason, it kept coming to my mind today. maybe its because i was sitting in the garage and talking about paris and germany. i dont know what the connection is, just going somewhere, i suppose. we saw a whole lot of flowers. understandably, since we went for the tulip festival. but these two remain fresh in my head. this one reminded me of the roses my mom got back from chandigarh when we went for kishen uncles wedding. met vijay uncle finally. bizzare. after all these years, everyone seems so different.
Updates
Imagine that you had a doppelganger. No, not an evil one, but a totally fearless double, one who was willing to push past all the doubts and anxieties and act anyway. Could you actually be your own best example?
My horoscope keeps telling me strange things. And my Uni, stranger.
For a moment it really feels like life is changing, like I am changing.
Is this really me? Then, the old fears, doubts and ghosts come back again.
And old losses. Aches in phantom limbs.
I was sitting in the back seat of the car, on the way from Jebel Ali to Mall of Emirates, thinking of such things and letting old ghosts go ... when a nusrat fateh ali khan show on radio sung this song "tum kab pardes se wapas ayoge, main ghut ghut mar jayunga, phir kisko jaan kahoge" ... musical irony
dxb
i desperately want to sort out the half million blogs, delete a million crappy posts and collect the rest in one place.
sometimes there's no time, and at others there's no resources. the net just barely works here. and i dont have much net time. hmmm ...
got into a raging fight with the bmi lady at check in. there's this lady (?) called emma i always get into a fight with. have done once before as well. she's a real nasty one. i hate flying now with all the hassles they keep dreaming up everyday.
its fun to be home though. getting (even more) fattened up with a non stop supply of goodies from the excellent and awesome bahadur singh, god bless him!
missing you. blue. true. :D
barbie munal
Originally uploaded by prerona.
barbie, bebu: Then
DSC03838
Originally uploaded by prerona.
barbie, bebu: Now
Trekkers United
Originally uploaded by prerona.
barbie, bebu: Forever
I'm a Goddess! Yeah, Right!
Horoscope for the day says:
Believe it or not, you have a twin, and not an evil one, either. This 'twin' is more like an inner child. It's your double, the self you would be if you had no fears, anxieties or misconceptions. Access that energy now.
And how do you find her? Wish I knew ...
And what about this me? Like I had once said before, what happens to the thorns that we pare off as we shape ourselves into who we want to be?
New discovery: I love my notebook!
