mist

missing steppenwolf (for mad men only) and aurangzeb at his father's bier (murdered voices beckon me?). and one scene from 4 weddings. After all these years, it still feels strange to be away from home just for this
not to be able to look up my books and movies when the itch strikes ;)
so maybe, this is what i miss ...



only madcap could help now
only madcap could do anything

make the air all around misty and dim
to let me see you once again

ofcourse, in the morning i myself would say
there are models of how it could happen this way

but in the moonlight, the moon you loved
i can close my eyes and dream of you again

madcap could help, madcap could help
madcap could make my dead walk again

somewhere inside pandora's box
your face, your voice, your touch your love

lost in a attic full of dust
madcap could bring you out again

and you were so beautiful
you skin albaster and pink, your eyes brown and grey

your eyes that loved so sincerely
that wed the eyes in the photograph that i burnt

you said they were heartbreakingly innocent
crumbling deceptive innocence that atlast fell that day

your ankles were so thing and delicate
speckled brown, turn charcoal grey

first thing i saw when i moved the red curtain
and took you out of the pot

i crushed you in my hands, once again
and shattered and scattered you away

to the bed of your gods,
to travel like you loved

maybe if i had sold them some more of soul
maybe prawns, maybe a road, maybe cities ...

maybe if i had negotiated better
we would still be together


but the bridge between us was so long and frail
roots to branches to leaves

now fall comes and leaves die dry drift away
only branches sway, over dead roots, giving away

i have made a treaty with the winds ...
they'll count my cost, but take the flower away

they'll count our costs,
the flower safe

you never saw how pretty it was
maybe it was too far away

so now they say its the only way
there's no tomorrow after today

but madcap doesnt come when called
you stand there calling, waiting till dawn

bereft, tear-dry, maddeningly sane
if at all, this be sane!